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Barbara Lippert's avatar

What a beautiful and brilliant essay, Elissa. I almost didn't read it because of the word "warrior" in the title and I thought it would be about "low-T." I'm so glad I did. I nodded all the way through it. And as for Platner, I have never received more inflammatory and frankly misogynistic comments on a FB posting than when I said early on that he should resign. When I mentioned the Nazoid tattoo, a wealthy woman who lives in Maine told me I should "do better." One of my best friends maintained that the woman was out drinking with him that night. Then there were the men, one of whom told me he's so tired of "Faux-Lib Hillary Clinton Seven Sisters" who've destroyed Democratic politics with their wussiness.

I'm still infuriated and find it hard to believe. Thank you for giving me a way to organize my emotions around this.

Peggy Acott's avatar

Elissa, this is one of the most fiercely beautiful things I have ever read. Thank you.

Valari Jack's avatar

Thanks for these words, Elissa. They have given me a chance to feel what I've been paralyzed by for this past week or so. You steadily hold a candle in this dark time.

Janet Graber's avatar

It almost hurt to "heart" this essay. How can I love something concerning all of life's brutality? I can because it screams the truth. My truth.

Elissa, I thank you deeply.

Kimberly Derrico's avatar

Oof…this piece…this truth…touched me deeply. Silence has never saved me. Silence has only served to churn and disperse the harm more thoroughly throughout my body like an infection that turns septic which is exactly as intended. My speaking out freed me from infection; it didn’t change anyone else. My mother also held similar beliefs to your mother. She still holds them today, and still lives with her husband of 47 years who is also my abuser. She’s heard the truth, and still mostly doesn’t understand why I stay away. Today, it’s enough that I do.

PS - I’m close to six years sober. I’ve found my community in She Recovers because it’s not just the alcohol 💜

Shaista Ali's avatar

This has so much feeling. It gave me so much feeling. There’s a grace threaded throughout that I appreciate, as we are all so tender. Thank you

Heidi L's avatar

Thank you, Elissa. I'm crushed by Platner, as well. I'm in Maine and I believe Jenny Racicot. The tattoo I could write off as a youthful drunken indiscretion, the first assault accusation as politically motivated, but Ms. Racicot's story should have the ring of truth for every woman. As does, unfortunately, the fact that most men don't get it.

Laura K Bray's avatar

A beautiful and necessary essay. Thank you.

Teresa's avatar

This is probably one of the most powerful and necessary pieces of writing I've ever read. In all honesty... EVER! Thank you for saying everything we, especially as women, needed and deserved to hear. Bold and beautiful!!!

Ronnie Gersten's avatar

Beautiful & at times heartbreaking essay. Your words speak the truth . The current state of affairs in our country makes me sad. Your writing os always spot on.

Natalie's avatar

This is a beautiful essay Elissa. I have had so many moments of paralysis recently but I will hold on to the reminder that every act of community and kindness is important even if it can feel tiny and truthfully, on some days, futile.

The Little Red Boat's avatar

Thank you, Elissa, for this deeply meaningful essay that we identify with and comprehend to its core.

Shannon Sweeney's avatar

Damn it hurts when the misogyny is coming from inside the house.

Patricia Young's avatar

So beautiful. So true. So real. Thank you.

Nokes's avatar

I’m a NZer and almost passed this article by too but two sentences in I was transfixed! Truth telling by great communicators like you will always be our guiding light. Keep going please. Love your words and how you use them and our time has come hasn’t it. Pandora’s box is open and we won’t go back in or turn away anymore. You might say your Mum missed the cut (as did mine), yet here you are, the best offering she could ever have given to the human family, and, we are all awake and watching! Kia kaha Mana Wahine Elissa. 💕

✨ Prajna O'Hara ✨'s avatar

Well said!

Kris's avatar

Elissa, this is so completely true and such powerful writing. It brought me to tears. Especially the many histories you incorporated. And the need for us to be constantly aware of the need to be the voice we need for our families and society. And you do it so eloquently. Thank you.