46 Comments

I didn't know I needed this text so much until I was crying while reading it. Thank you for bringing this to light. As a "beginner" in the writing space I feel less alone and will definitely be mindful of the way I interact with other writers. THANKS!!

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"The craft of the work. The work of the work. The fact of the work. The beauty and clarity of the work. The work you are meant to create, that haunts you, that belongs to you and absolutely no one else but you." -- Thank you for sharing this, needed to read this today

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A Doggy Dog world. I’m making that a print to hang up by my desk. Also, you’ve always been the one to tell me to get back to work, and it’s always the answer.

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I cannot look at or read Sharon's work without thinking of the Doggy Dog World story.

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Oof yes, a lot of this rings true. I am now studiedly oblivious to competitive behaviour and envious comments - I just let them bounce off. I'm under no obligation to reciprocate. But now I will remind myself that it's a doggy dog world and wag my tail at them! That's far better!

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I have a well-worn copy of Friedman's book, but I think it is time to read it again. Thanks, also, for your last paragraph. Words to live by and write by.

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Thank you --- It's always time for Bonnie's book! I have three of them, in various stages of disrepair and busted binding!

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um, i need to read that story about the gal who sets the car on fire?

and thank you for putting words to this. the more i sit still, literally the more hours i tuck into the cushion, the less competitive i feel.

well, in glimpses i can see it.

i wonder: is it growing older? is it seeing my nervous animal mind cycle through the weirdness lurking in my subconscious, knowing as i read your words that we all have it?

this sitting still seems to lead inexorably to a certain compassion for, and connectedness with, all writers. i'm working on this. supporting other writers has now earned a devoted segment of time during my day. feels very good.

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Crazy story about the car and the fire and the road trip.

I do think that getting quiet helps, because it helps separate the ego from the self, if that makes any sense. But it also seems to be a human instinct, though, which makes it complicated. I definitely think that for me it comes with growing older -- I am, at least on paper, so NOT interested in the clamor and the race. I get exhausted just thinking about it. Art-making is a complex bit of business, every way round. Supporting artists in their work and getting them to understand that their support of other artists is part of the deal -- this feels key to me.

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Bless you, Elissa. This could NOT be more timely for me personally, and I will share widely amongst my lovely current compatriot authors at Sibylline Press.

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Thank you! I personally loved all of this, but especially: "Slowly pour the warm milk, about 1 cup at a time, into the butter-flour mixture, whisking constantly. It will be very thick when you first add the milk, and thinner as you slowly pour in the 3 cups"--that is how I write, whisking constantly, very thick at first, then thinner!

I have been known to waft between equal parts jealousy and imposter syndrome. The "who gives a shit about my writing and why do I even do it?"The only thing I know to be true is that the writing (and only the writing) is my salvation. It is the thing itself. When I am in it I don't know who you are, or what you've won, or what I've lost--and I look up and hours, and sometimes days have passed and there are words to show for it, sometimes genius, sometimes dreadful--a sense of deep personal accomplishment--but I'm always, always, saved by it.

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It’s always the thing itself. But the noise? OY.

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Truth.

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Fanastic post --I love the final paragraph: "If you are a creative who is at this moment thinking about who is doing what and where and why and for whom, stop: go back to work. And if someone in your creative world needs your help, give it to them. Be generous, and always, always, be wise."

And love that it is followed by a comfort food recipe. Perfect :)

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Thank you for this, Elissa, this long drink of water to a famished writer who has just blissfully emerged from a productive writing session to dip my toe in here on Substack and try to find the places where I won't feel like an old failure. I adore Bonne Friedman's book and am so relieved to have landed here early on in my day. I think I will go read it again, and yes, get back to work. After closing this screen.

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I sent you a private message. 🙏🏾❤️

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Alex, where did you send it?

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Loved this! Just so true and I love Bonnie Friedman’s book. My novel came out on the heels of The Lovely Bones and even though the NYT reviewer said my book was better…well, like you said… I am always telling writers to go back to work. Because that is all there is. The rest is just lint.

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Yours is one of the few subscriptions I don't think of giving up or putting on pause. The way you speak truth, the way you write, is so damned nourishing for my off-kilter, naive, erratically creative soul.

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Thank you so much --

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Elissa, every time I read your work I think, “how does she do that?” - so thank you. Thank you for sharing your wisdom so thoughtfully and beautifully. I took a screen shot of part of this so I can post it at my desktop. I’m so looking forward to reading On Permission!

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Thank you!

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First of all, it's always the right time for mac and cheese. :)

One thing that can be a thrill is to just throw everything against envy and fly in the face of it by praising and promoting the person/work you envy. I find that to be the case, anyway. It feels kind of radical and exciting.

Another thought I've had is how envy amongst writers is further complicated by the fact that many of us are also readers--for me at least, I might envy someone's success, but I want to read their work.

Anyway, what I really love is this: "The antidote to envy is one’s own work. Always one’s own work. Not the thinking about it. Not the assessing of it. But the doing of it." I've been thinking about the cleansing quality of doing the work in general, when I'm feeling all gross from networking and marketing, etc. So important to keep the balance of doing the work.

Thanks for a good read!

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Excellent

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